60 Baby Puns, Jokes, and Giggly Gags That’ll Rattle Your Funny Bone

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The Crib Notes on Baby Humor

Oh, babies. Tiny humans who sleep all day, cry all night, and somehow still manage to make everyone swoon over their adorable giggles and impossibly tiny socks. Whether you’re a sleep-deprived parent, a baby enthusiast, or just here for some infant-sized laughs, this is the nursery rhyme of your comedic dreams.

Today, we’re bottling up some of the best baby puns, dad jokes, and kid-approved quips to rattle your funny bone. Prepare for diaper-loads of fun—you’re about to get paci-fied with humor!

Punny Baby Puns

  1. I cried when my baby stroller broke, but I guess it just needed a push.
  2. Babies are great at math—they can count on their fingers and toes!
  3. My baby’s jokes always come with a rattle.
  4. You know what’s a baby’s favorite type of music? Rock-a-bye tunes!
  5. Babies don’t have teeth because they can’t handle the tooth yet.
  6. Nap time for babies is basically their hibernation station.
  7. My baby’s got milk and honey vibes—sweet and spoiled!
  8. Want to impress a baby? Just rattle them up a little.
  9. My baby started crawling—guess they’re on the move to their first milestone.
  10. Diapers: where the potty humor truly begins.
  11. A baby’s favorite mode of transportation? The cry-ycle!
  12. I love my baby’s laugh—it’s a real belly giggle.
  13. What’s a baby’s favorite dessert? Paci-cakes!
  14. I tried to teach my baby how to juggle, but they just threw a tantrum.
  15. Why do babies love bees? They’re all about the bzzz-ness.
  16. Our baby’s favorite exercise is crawling lunges.
  17. Babies don’t need to multitask—they’re already drooling while crying.
  18. My baby told a joke today. It wasn’t funny, but it got a paci-fying smile.
  19. Babies are born pun-tential comedians—they’re natural born entertainers.
  20. My baby doesn’t snore; they coo like an angel.

Dad Jokes About Babies

  1. Why did the baby bring a ladder to bed? Because it wanted to reach its dreams!
  2. I asked my baby if it was hungry, and it said, “Waaah!” Classic.
  3. What’s a baby’s least favorite food? Spoiled milk.
  4. I named my baby’s favorite blanket “Bruce” because it’s the ultimate security guard.
  5. Why don’t babies work out? They don’t want to pull a mush-cle.
  6. How do babies type emails? With their rattle boards.
  7. What’s a baby’s favorite social media? RattleChat.
  8. My baby’s first word was “Dad!” I’m sure “Mom” will come in… eventually.
  9. Babies always leave a mark—usually a spit-up stain.
  10. Why did the baby wear a diaper to the party? It didn’t want to make a mess of things.
  11. What’s a baby’s favorite genre of books? Board books—they love the hard-hitting stuff.
  12. What do you call a baby that sleeps well? A dream come true.
  13. My baby’s favorite drink is formula—but I think they prefer the powdered version.
  14. What’s a baby’s favorite game? Peek-a-boo, because it’s a real eye-opener.
  15. Why don’t babies play hide-and-seek? They always “goo-goo” where they are.
  16. Babies have a built-in alarm system, but unfortunately, you can’t snooze it.
  17. How do babies stay in shape? By lifting their bottles—great for bicep curls.
  18. Why don’t babies trust mirrors? They can’t tell the real deal from their reflection.
  19. My baby’s a genius—it already knows how to push my buttons.
  20. What do you call a baby who sings? A lullababy.

Kid-Friendly Baby Jokes

  1. What do you call a baby who loves to dance? A boogie baby!
  2. Why did the baby sit on the computer? To keep an eye on the mouse!
  3. What’s a baby’s favorite game? Crying tag—it’s contagious!
  4. How do babies talk to each other? With baby monitors!
  5. What do you call a baby superhero? The Diaper Avenger!
  6. Why don’t babies like math class? Too many formulas.
  7. What’s a baby’s favorite treat? Bottle pops.
  8. How do you keep a baby entertained? Give them a bottle of bubbles—they’ll blow you away!
  9. Why did the baby bring a pencil to dinner? To draw attention!
  10. What do babies wear to sleepovers? Their snuggle suits!
  11. Why did the baby take up gardening? To grow up naturally!
  12. How do babies watch cartoons? With their paci-fiers tuned in!
  13. Why do babies love cake? It’s their first crush.
  14. Why was the baby crawling backwards? They were in “reverse” gear.
  15. What do you call a group of babies singing? A choo-choo choir!
  16. Why do babies love the moon? It’s always up past their bedtime.
  17. What’s a baby’s favorite part of a song? The “goo-goo” bridge.
  18. Why did the baby cross the road? To get to the diaper store!
  19. Why do babies like strollers? Because they’re a real wheely good ride.
  20. What’s a baby’s favorite breakfast? Oat-me-me-me-al.

“That’s a Wrap (or a Swaddle)”

And there you have it, a bundle of laughs that’s as irresistible as a baby’s giggle and as messy as their mealtime antics. Whether you’re sleepless in the nursery or just here for the kicks (pun intended), we hope you found these baby jokes and puns as delightful as a freshly powdered tushie.

Now go forth and share these with your friends, because laughter—like parenting—is better when shared. And don’t worry, no diapers were harmed in the making of this blog post.